WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Blasting “dumb scientists for not pondering of this earlier than,” Donald J. Trump stated that the planet would quiet down “straight away” if everybody would simply activate the air-conditioning.
“Scientists go round with their lab coats and take a look at tubes and act just like the planet is burning up,” he stated. “I suppose these beauties have by no means considered turning on the A.C.”
“Air-conditioning is the reply,” he stated. “It’s the hydroxychloroquine of local weather.”
Arguing that his concept was “primarily based on math,” Trump illustrated what would occur to the planet’s temperature if individuals world wide all turned on the air-conditioning at the very same time.
“Let’s say two billion individuals every turned down the A.C. 4 levels,” he stated. “Similar to that, the planet could be eight billion levels cooler.”
Trump disclosed that he didn’t give you this mathematical equation all by himself, acknowledging the help of the Secretary of Training, Betsy DeVos.