We’re all celebrating a little differently this year, but that doesn’t mean we can’t still deliver cheer! Here are a few gift ideas for this unusual holiday season:
A festive hat for your dad. (He’s so hard to shop for!)
You know that thing from “Men in Black” that you wave in front of people’s faces, and it shines a bright light in their eyes and makes them forget what happened? That would be a great gift for anyone on your list this year.
A dog leash for your dog.
I did some research, and it seems like that “Men in Black” stick thing is actually called a Neuralyzer. According to Google, it’s an “electro-biomechanical neural-transmitting zero-synapse repositioner” that has the ability to wipe minds. Science is incredible.
It (the Neuralyzer) definitely can make you forget at least one full year, since—spoiler—it helped Tommy Lee Jones forget decades of his life. So, yeah, a great gift in 2020!
This is more of a question than a gift suggestion, but is there a store where I can get one of these Neuralyzer thingies? I keep going to Best Buy since it seems logical that’s where it would be. (I mean, it’s called Best Buy for a reason.) But the past few times that I’ve gone, Tim in aisle four has become all riled up and shouted, “You’re standing too close to me!” and, “Stay six feet away!” Tim, it sounds like you need to relax (or be Neuralyzed).
I mean, we know it exists, out there in the world, in some form. I’m still talking about the Neuralyzer. It was a physical object in the movie, right? So, for sure, there’s a prop closet somewhere with that stick. The question is: Is it still functional?
I have a fan theory that the Men in Black are actually the aliens and not the humans, and the movie is titled that because they (the aliens) are forced to live in the shadows (the “black”). I only ever saw the first movie in the franchise, so it’s possible the writers and directors explored this theory in later films.
Here’s another question: Why did Will Smith stop agreeing to participate in the “Men in Black” franchise? You’d think that he was so involved in it that he’d see it through to the end. Did the franchise stop including him because he got to be too expensive? Or did somebody Neuralyze him and make him forget that the movies ever even happened?
A PlayStation 5, perhaps the greatest gift of all.
