First, there was “Portrait of a Lady on Fire,” then “Ammonite,” and now “The World to Come.” Here are some suggestions to keep the Hollywood trend of tragic-white-lesbian period pieces going.
“The Donner Party”
It’s 1846, and American pioneers are headed to California in covered wagons. Two white women, Margaret and Betsy, wearing bonnets and dirty, powder-blue dresses, make the journey with their boring, whatever husbands. Halfway through the trip, their food supply runs out and someone in the group dies, giving the pioneers no choice but to eat his corpse in order to survive. The group assembles around their horrifying meal, and Margaret’s hand grazes Betsy’s as they both reach for the same lifeless arm. Their eyes meet for just a second before they shyly look away. The tension is palpable as they chow down on their dead friend. For the next hour of the movie, they do nothing but glance at each other. Finally, they kiss once. Just when you want them to kiss more, they almost get caught. They make a promise to each other: if one dies, the other will eat her to stay alive. They mustn’t let their love get in the way of survival. Unfortunately, Margaret dies after getting trampled by an ox. But Betsy cannot keep her promise; she cannot bring herself to eat her lover, and so she dies, too.
“The Penguin Zoologist”
In nineteenth-century Antarctica, a white woman zoologist lives a solitary life studying penguins’ mating habits. Another white woman, Madeleine, and her researcher husband, arrive in town. When Madeleine says that she doesn’t understand the appeal of penguins, it sets off a mutual hatred between the women. But, one day, Madeleine hears a mysterious and mesmerizing sound that leaves her spellbound. She realizes that it’s the zoologist, imitating a penguin mating call. Madeleine asks the zoologist to teach her how to make the beautiful sound. The zoologist initially says no, but after some intense, prolonged eye contact she reluctantly agrees. The zoologist tries to teach Madeleine, but Madeleine’s mouth won’t oblige. The zoologist asks, “May I?” and gently uses her fingers to show Madeleine where to place her tongue. It’s confusing and erotic but it is cut short when Madeleine’s husband walks in on them. Madeleine tells the zoologist, “We can’t see each other any more, and also I’m moving away.” She looks down in embarrassment and then they kiss, passionately, a single tear rolling down each of their cheeks. The next day, the zoologist sits, bereft, on a piece of ice, allowing it to drift out into the freezing ocean, where she dies. Madeleine occasionally will make a penguin call and gently weep.
“The Haunted Victorian House”
It’s 1932, rural Massachusetts. A white widow returns to her dead husband’s home town to scatter his ashes. Upon her arrival, she discovers that his estranged sister has shown up, too. She decides it’s her wifely duty to hate her sister-in-law, because her husband is no longer alive to do so himself. After days of ignoring each other, they randomly decide that they both need to get out of the house and embark on a long walk along a craggy cliff. The next morning, the widow awakens, naked and alone, with flashback memories of an erotic dream she had about her sister-in-law. The widow rushes downstairs to look for her and discovers her standing in the vestibule, completely stunning—and totally transparent. She is actually a ghost! Determined to physically connect once more, the widow puts her arms around her ghost love, but her arms pass right through her, and she hugs herself. A devastating montage follows of the widow attempting to hug the ghost but actually hugging herself, for what seems like the entire second act of the film. One morning, the widow rises and goes downstairs to attempt another embrace, only to find a note that reads, “Think of me like the air. You cannot see me, but I am everywhere.” Devastated, she hurls herself off the craggy cliff.
“The Moon Landing”
Cape Canaveral, 1984: a white female American astronaut launches into space, on her way to becoming the first woman on the moon. She touches down just as her rival—a white female Russian astronaut—lands at the very same moment she does. The undisputed tie leaves both women seething. Naturally, they ignore each other and go about deploying instruments and setting up seismometers, as if the other one isn’t there. But everything changes when they both accidentally grab the same geologic sample, at the exact same time. The tips of their gloved fingers touch, causing their faces to flush deeply with suppressed ecstasy, setting off a series of furtive stolen glances. This goes on for the next seventy minutes of the movie, until the American says, “My whole life I wanted to be the first woman on the moon, but now I know that was just because the moon is the only place I can be . . . myself.” The women then take their space helmets off to kiss but die immediately because they don’t have oxygen.
