WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—With less than two weeks until the election, a new poll of likely voters shows Donald J. Trump losing badly to Hunter Biden.
Though Hunter Biden holds a commanding lead over Trump nationally, the poll reveals that he also trounces the President in such key swing states as Michigan, Wisconsin, and Pennsylvania.
Voters preferred Hunter Biden over Trump when asked who would do a better job of “handling the pandemic,” “creating jobs,” and “caring about people like me.”
In the most ominous news for the President, if Hunter Biden were somehow prosecuted, convicted, and locked up, voters would still choose him over Trump by a double-digit margin.
