WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—A broad spectrum of national-security experts support the immediate and total withdrawal of Donald J. Trump from the United States.
In an open letter signed by over three hundred members of the military and intelligence communities, the experts wrote that Trump’s withdrawal is “long past due.”
“After nearly four years, this conflict is over,” they wrote. “It is time to reduce the troop level from one to zero.”
“It is no longer in the interest of the United States for Trump to be stationed here,” they added.
The experts recommended that further steps be taken to reduce Trump’s footprint on U.S. soil, and called for the immediate withdrawal of Ivanka, Jared, Eric, and Don, Jr.
